Cosmic Nonsense

A long time ago- I'm not going to say how long ago because I saw a Family Guy episode recently where a 50 year old woman referred to a piece of furniture as a Davenport. I wasn't quite sure what a Davenport was (See! See!)and had to look it up, which I'm happy about. What I'm not happy about is referring back to things that happened a long, long time ago. I almost started this post with "Decades ago..." but I'm aware that to younger readers (I think I have two) I may as well be referring to FDR.

Earlier this week I sold a comforter set I'm no longer using to a nice couple. I had listed my number on Craigslist, and called back a woman who'd left a message. Her husband answered and said she was busy with something. Later in the conversation, feeling comfortable with me I suppose, he laughed (and laughed- he seemed to find it quite funny) that his wife had just gotten dentures and was putting them in. Umm, ok. We set up a time for them to come by.

I was expecting a nice, elderly couple. I pictured her in Koret, maybe purple polyester pants and a matching top with flower appliques. I answered the door to a slim, long-haired, attractive woman (wearing Chico's) and her tall, aging, but still had it going on retired cop husband. They'd been married 48 years. They were a sexy couple. Later I realized she was the denture lady. Strange this age thing.

Anyway, I was about to tell you about something that happened, yes, DECADES AGO. Way, way, before Photoshop. When we used somethings called darkrooms, and I spent hours in them sandwiching negatives in the enlarger, burning, dodging, using Marshall's Photo Oils, everything I could to make my visions come to life. Back then, way back then (early '80s), I put together a series of photos called Cosmic Nonsense. Now I'm starting a Photoshop version of Cosmic Nonsense, photos that are simply something to look at and to which ascribing meaning would be silly. Visual impact and mindless surrealism. Images that confuse the brain a little (it's good for you!)

Here's my first Photoshop one. I think it has some visual punch to it.

Look Carefully

You can see her eyes in the first 'N'...

Once I have this technique down I can move on to cheesy postcards. Think about it: More than half of all postcards spell out the name of the place and have pictures within the letters.

Twister

Working on this image in Photoshop, I had a memory of my grandmother playing Twister with my sister and me. I remember her with her foot on a green dot, reaching way across the mat to put her hand on a red dot. As she did so she laughed and said "I'm a grandmother!" She was a slim, beautiful, awesome grandmother. How cool is that, having a splice of memory from 1968, of playing Twister with your grandma?

Magic Kitty Ride

Does this look like a happy kitty on a magic bubble ride, or a precariously-perched feline about to plunge to the pavement? This is an image I'm including in my childrens' activity book project, so I'm seriously hoping for the former.

Watercolor

I opened my blinds the other morning and saw this fat rainbow over Vashon Island.

On Track

Filtered Rainbow

One of my Photoshop assignments this week was to apply three filters to a photo. I used the film grain, brush strokes / spatter, and smart sharpen filters on a photo I took a few years ago. I wanted to give it kind of an old oil painting feel. I think this turned out pretty cool.

Photoshopping Round the Stars

Anyone else remember Space Truckin' by Deep Purple? Space truckin' round the starrrrs...

I'm taking a Photoshop class and I love it. I've learned some indispensable skills like how to soften wrinkles on faces (Yep, tried it on one of my own photos in which I looked disturbingly 'mature'). I'm also doing lots of experimentation with surrealism because that's where I live.

I want to figure out how to add some stars to the 'night sky' I created compliments of the magic wand and paint bucket tools. I tried drawing in a UFO with the pen tool. It wasn't bad for a first try. A big yellow-ish full moon would be cool too. If anyone reading this speaks Photoshop I would love to hear from you.

I want to get good enough at Photoshop to create images so powerful they alter consciousness.

That, and how to use the warp tool to make myself look thinner.

Drake's conversation with his parents

Revel in the awesomeness of my articulate, 16 month old grandnephew.

I definitely heard him say "I said yes!"

...

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
― Albert Einstein

Amboy Dukes, The Journey to the Center of the Mind

About the Video Above...

I first heard the song Journey to the Center of the Mind when I was eight years old. I was at a school carnival at Pinecrest Elementary, on a ride called The Whip. Cars moved on an oval track and lurched violently around each curve. This was supposed to be fun.

I remember The Whip because it was the first time I'd ever been on a ride by myself. It felt weird. "This is going to be my life when I'm 50!" I thought to myself. Well, no, I didn't and I'm glad.

I had a goldfish in a plastic bag on the ride with me. Anyone remember Pitch-a-Fish? If you landed a ping pong ball in one of the fish bowls on tiered shelves, you got to take the fish home in a plastic bag. With water in it. Did I really need to say that?

As the Whip did its terrible turns I worried about my fish. The ride moved fast. And those violent lurches... Was it upsetting my baggie-encased Comet ? I've always been sensitive. I cared about that fish.

This next part...who knows if I'm putting this together right. It all become a collage with each passing decade. But what I remember is hearing Journey to the Center of the Mind for the first time, at the carnival. Maybe while still on the ride. Really, it doesn't matter where I was because I slipped the mortal coil and flew.

If my third grade brain had been scanned at that moment, it would have shown my neurons glowing neon colors, pulsating and flashing like disco lights. The song made me ecstatic. I'd never had a song- maybe anything- make me feel that way before.

Journey to the Center of the Mind still makes me fly- in an overweight, close-to-menopause kind of way.

Everything about the video above makes me happy. Twenty year old Ted Nugent (did you know he was in the Amboy Dukes? No? Come to me for this sort of thing. I know it). Twenty year old Ted Nugent on guitar, smokin' hot and a great guitar player too. And if that wasn't enough, there are Go-Go dancers. I LOVE Go-Go dancers. If I could be anything at any point in history I'd be a 60's Go-Go dancer.

If there's even one person who watches this and gets how special it is, I'll be happy. Liking it for it's anachronistic charm is fine too.

Yeah, Yeah, I know, Ted Nugent's politics today... I'm not wild about his pro NRA stance, but his hunting is fine with me. I love his cookbook title "Kill it and Grill it". Subtlety is over-rated.

I saw Ted in 1977. He was insane; a wild man. It was awesome, but I love his restraint and little gestures in the video below. And the guitar playing. Wow.

So, check out Young Ted and some sixties psychedelic fun.

Dart on a Map

www.dartonamap.net

According to Dart on a Map I should go to the following places:

1. Eastern Oregon
2. Antarctica
3. The middle of the Pacific ocean

Eastern Oregon might be nice. Or not. I think I drove through it with my boyfriend Stuart 90 years ago.

I wouldn't go to Antarctica because it violates my 'More than half an hour away to obtain a diet coke' rule.

Speaking of diet coke, I've cut down my consumption. At the age of 50 I discovered coffee. I now like ridiculously strong, mud-like coffee.

The middle of the Pacific ocean...a cruise! That would be nice.

I wonder where the next three throws will take me.

I love Dart on a Map.

Tunnel

Great Quote

“If you stand up and be counted, from time to time you may get yourself knocked down. But remember this: A man flattened by an opponent can get up again. A man flattened by conformity stays down for good.” ~Thomas J. Watson

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Fair Enough

I had better things to do at the Puyallup Fair than take photos of rides. There were roller coasters to ride, buttery jam-filled scones to eat (what am I supposed to eat at a state fair? Salad?), bunnies to pet and a mama pig with her hungry babies to watch (never eating bacon again. Never, ever). There were friends to have fun with and interesting people to see. All those reasons are why I only took a few quick photos. But I could spend hours taking pictures of rides. The color, the form, the motion...they are just so beautiful.

Most Improved

Today at work I received what was basically a 'You don't suck as much as you used to!' award. I got to select a $25 gift. I ordered a bed for Annabelle, although her favorite bed of course is the one I spent $850 on last February. Within a month she tore the netting under the box spring enough to fashion a hammock-like dwelling for herself. It's kind of clever really.

'You don't suck as much as you used to' awards are nothing new for me. The summer of '73 found me the winner of Camp Yonahlossee's esteemed Most Improved in Golf award. Mmm hmm.

I think I won Most Improved in Arts and Crafts the following summer. What was that supposed to mean- that I stopped getting glue in my hair by August?

I'm definitely not the winner of the most improved blogger award. I haven't even thought about blogging the past few weeks.

Higher Power

Do I need to explain how cool it was to be this close? Hopefully not, because I'm at a loss for words (as in being able to hear any).

Few things center me in the moment and the magic like the Blue Angels.

Bubble Cat

Annabelle exercises her aesthetic sensibilities with an art deco motif.

Tacoma Narrows Bridge Walk